Today's random philosophical question: what is passion? Passion, from what I've learned in my very short 19 years on this planet, is that little spark, that little bit of warmth, that as long as you feel its heat, you feel alive. The second it dies, so too do you. But I haven't answered my own question. What is passion? To have a passion for something is to be willing to die for it. If it were gone, you might as well be, too, and you'd rather it survive than yourself...

I once felt like that...I was in love with the perfect man. A part of me still is. But my passion has become blurred. Maybe I would still die for him. But will I ever get the opportunity to test my convictions? That is the essence of passion. There must be something fueling it, but there also must be something endangering it. Without the knowledge that what we have could be taken from us at any moment, we become bored with it. If we don't have that fear that we will one day lose it, we no longer treasure it as much. I take my relationships for granted. My relationships with God, my friends, my loved ones...I don't often feel that they are in danger. I don't think any of us do. Granted, we can't live our lives in fear, but we can't lose that fear entirely either. To do so is to lose what makes us feel most alive. Without fear, without despair, there can be no hope, no joy. And I would rather be at the darker end of the spectrum than risk losing the light at all...

~November 9, 2003