A View From Purgatory

How is it that a person, someone you know or are related to or know about is here one instant and then the next instant they are gone. What is that essence that animates our bodies. Is it a life force, something tangible that can be measured or quantified? Spirit or soul perhaps? I don’t know if I can believe it is just ether floating around in the universe and then somehow gets captured or concentrated in our bodies.

If our lives are a product of the sum of the parts, how do these parts become assembled into a person? What force takes a bunch of dissociated atoms and produces a biochemist, or a priest, or a mother.?

I received bad news today about my cousin Linda. My sister-cousin as I like to think of her. Linda has cancer. Stage IV they called it, whatever that means. I only know that it’s a very bad illness, one she is not likely to recover from.

So today, I found out that she is in hospice care. Hospice is where you go when the doctors think there is nothing more they can do for you and you are going to die. They make you as comfortable as possible and then go off to treat other people and just let you die.

Another one, one more part of my life is about to fold up and disappear. This continues the convergence of events in my life that are wiping out the old and spawning a new life for me. I have always had strong women in my life. My life revolved around taking care of them and loving them. Now three of them have died in one year, only my daughter is left.

As they all have left this earth, I wonder in awe. Like some celestial confluence, when the planets all align on the same side of the sun, or the son crosses the spatial plane of the galaxy. If in fact they are gone, where did they go? Are the quantum physicists correct that there are at least eleven dimensions? And if so, could they all be in one or another of them in some form that I cannot sense? I hope so, I hope that they are there as a part of my past, present and future. I know for sure that my former life is only one part, one ingredient in the new synthesis of my future. How may lives to you get to live, one two three or maybe eleven.