Barbara Brown Taylor. Leaving Church, A Memoir of Faith. HarperSanFrancisco, 2006.
"Leaving church" is not the same as "loosing faith" or even "leaving God." In a large part of the Christian tradition, it is not even close. It is amazing how anti-institutional most of the Gospels really are. Of course, the institution there is the Temple. Yet, Jesus gives the okay for the "institution" of the church.
But when I read of the beginnings of the church, I cannot help but think of Samuel's warnings to Israel of the dangers inherent in the institution of kingship. Every institution tends to take on a life of its own with its own demands for sacrifice and priviledge.
Loss of Romance
Swept up in the calling to ministry, Taylor felt the romance of service in the church. She actually wanted to wear the clergy shirts. Gradually, the whole enterprise took on a different meaning. To me, it is like what happens even in the best of marriages. Romance fights desperately against the pettiness of routine or, rather, reality.
Every gospel minister has experienced this. It is part of reality. I mean, if you really want to get frustrated with people, experience churchianity with all its expectations for a little while. Worse, there just is not much give in it. Sooner or later, it rears its ugly head (full of curlers?)
Like marital romance it takes constant deliberate infusions in order to survive. Perhaps this is why,like marriage/divorce, clergy burnout is so high. Particularly when congregations are anxious that their hirelings carry the weight of ministry for them.
The response of the hierarchy? Usually nothing. Sometimes manifest expressed concern. More often, dire warnings and thinly veiled threats -- coupled with high sounding idealistic slogans such as the "responsibilities of covenant relationships" which, being interpreted, means the expectations of the hierarchy over against the calling of the individual clergy.(The hierarchy, after all, has promised nothing on their side of the covenant).
But everyone has their boogieman. It is just refreshing to read about someone else who has faced theirs and learned to survive.
8/25/06